Wednesday, July 11, 2007
I'm not sure why, but i'm just easily discouraged and depressed these days. But others see it as over-sensitivity.
To be honest i really hate that term... I really think we all have moments like that... Or is it me?
I was really scared, because half of me didn't know why am i being so annoying, and half of me is really afraid that my depression is back again.
I don't want to lose what i did in the past, especially my love ones and myself.
But it was until today then i realised how impatient the people around me are towards such situation. And it's really making me even sadder.
They wouldn't ask what happen, they wouldn't really understand.
Why am i the one who's worried if my depression will affect others when they were the one who affected me?
Sometimes i really wish i couldn't care much about them, just like how they did to me. And even if they give a hoot, it's insensitive stuffs.
But as much as we weren't that close, i didn't want to lose that friendships either. So in the end i apologise again.
But usually when they get mad or depress they just do whatever they want and said the meanest things without saying sorry, as if it has never happen before.
It make me feel really very sad and discouraged... Because i know if even i have problems, or worst if my depression's back... They will never be there for me. In fact they are the ones to steer away.
After months of working together... I kinda hoped for this relationships to last.
Why am i the only one who feel this way...?
Is it me? Am i the only one blinded?
The good thing is, the ones who were there for me, namely Tous, is still there...
But i'm still so sad and the only way is to keep praying...
oh my God, can i complain?
It's been awhile, but my mood swing/ depression is back to haunt me again lately...
I'm not sure why, but i'm just easily discouraged and depressed these days. But others see it as over-sensitivity.
To be honest i really hate that term... I really think we all have moments like that... Or is it me?
I was really scared, because half of me didn't know why am i being so annoying, and half of me is really afraid that my depression is back again.
I don't want to lose what i did in the past, especially my love ones and myself.
But it was until today then i realised how impatient the people around me are towards such situation. And it's really making me even sadder.
They wouldn't ask what happen, they wouldn't really understand.
Why am i the one who's worried if my depression will affect others when they were the one who affected me?
Sometimes i really wish i couldn't care much about them, just like how they did to me. And even if they give a hoot, it's insensitive stuffs.
But as much as we weren't that close, i didn't want to lose that friendships either. So in the end i apologise again.
But usually when they get mad or depress they just do whatever they want and said the meanest things without saying sorry, as if it has never happen before.
It make me feel really very sad and discouraged... Because i know if even i have problems, or worst if my depression's back... They will never be there for me. In fact they are the ones to steer away.
After months of working together... I kinda hoped for this relationships to last.
Why am i the only one who feel this way...?
Is it me? Am i the only one blinded?
The good thing is, the ones who were there for me, namely Tous, is still there...
But i'm still so sad and the only way is to keep praying...
Labels: emo
Au revoir
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